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Wes Ryan, performing “Note”
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Many nights i write suicide notes it's One of the ways i cope i draft them long Hand but i've yet to craft one that Meets my standards so here i am On days i feel damned it's 50 50 to stay Equipped when i'm in a big city i avoid The subway i'm afraid i might end up Beneath it there are times in toronto i Stood on the platform waiting for Tapping at the timing as the trains Arriving sites locked in the headlights Shining we're supposed to move toward The light right It's not my intention to raise anyone's Concern Bell in canada says let's talk so i Thought i'd mention it's something i've Learned to live with this abyss in which I exist i wish it were fiction My mind twists condition to affliction My spirit lists like the ships i know I'm missing there are days i just stop Wishing since various childhood abuses Rarely his life rivaled my desire for a Knife a noose a great height or fire Many nights i conspired to make my Escape rarely contemplating the arrival It's gone on for so long i could be the Poster boy for survival to that end i've Come up with a plan so elaborate it Requires a producer stagehands a Candidate council grant for the arts to Mount it Stand a good chance of receiving funding
One night only pay what you can when the Show closes there'll be one less on the Margins The media takes suicide and makes it Topical celebrities check out and we Speak about what we can't grieve but What happens in northern ontario when Five girls conspire at sunrise papers Hardly pay attention just a one inch Mention in the back of it it's Newsworthy if it's controversial so we Shift shame to the contemporary and Blame technology now while i believe Cyber bullying to be a real threat the Truth is youth have been dropping since Long before the internet Sorry for the deflection this is about Me why i reflect on this unnatural Selection i can't post this on Tindergrindermatch.com christianmingle Or okcupid but if there's anyone looking For a temporary relationship I can offer you passion like each day is The last one i know that suicide for Whatever reason is perceived as Treasonous i don't want to play my own Judas there's not much i can commit to That's obvious so i'll make one promise And it's this while i'm alive you'll Hear rhymes from my lips my lips would Have kissed the earth and if i were the Earth i would hold you the way gravity Grasped the atmosphere grounded with Horizons bred so that your breeze can
Move easily across my geography this Landscape which has been scorched and Tortured your light is found to be Fertile ground for love pulling blossoms From my depths fed with the nutrients of Each caress gentleness like dew on my Flesh if i were the earth i would Respect the fire wind and rain you bring Your elements make this strange terrain Feel safe again for many of us the past Feels disastrous but we have survived Catastrophe together we are a new Ecosystem sexy like evolution because Love is about creation course burning Waters flowing winds blowing seeds have Changed for future harvest and i am ever So grateful to share this earth with you [Applause] You